Turn Strangers Into Clients With The F.R.O.G. Strategy (Shannon DeSouza)

Shannon DeSouza


Are you looking for more clients? Are you having a hard time finding them?

Are you spending too much time trying to find your next customer?

If you are trying to figure out how to run complex ads or thinking about a big splashy launch, I’m here to tell you there is a much simpler way!

Here’s a fact: 70% of millennials use ad blockers and 41% even skip TV commercials. If you want to make sales and bring in leads, you need to show up differently.

So why not use the most powerful tool in your social media arsenal? Direct messages! Yes, you read that right—actually talk directly to your prospects, community and audience.

What are DMs?

Direct messages (DMs), or private messages, are one-on-one conversations between two people on social media. This is an opportunity to have a conversation with your prospect that is not public to everyone else on any social media platform. You can use this space to build a relationship with a stranger and have natural and meaningful conversations.

Why Do You Need To Use DMs For Your Business?

Connecting with new prospects on DMs is like dating—you have to build a connection FIRST before you can ask someone out on a date or expect them to say yes when you ask for the sale. And this is why DMs are so powerful.

Direct messages are how you get to know new prospects, build rapport, qualify the lead and then ultimately close deals. They’re where the human connection makes all the difference for your business.

Prospects want to be sold to with a human touch, not be seen as dollar signs. If you’re on Instagram, you’ve probably come across sales posts from people with 100k+ followers. These posts are great advertising, but they don’t attract prospects who want to work with you at your core value and vision. These sales posts can also backfire by making your audience feel like you’re out there just for the sale and not because you’re passionate about what you do and how it helps others.

Gaining a sale starts with building trust. You need to build a relationship with a prospect before they purchase from you. But, how do you do that?

Worth Your Time?

75% of consumers prefer Private Messaging over traditional service channels.

Building trust

Getting prospects to trust your services is one of the biggest challenges in the sales process. You need a way to break the ice, i.e. the invisible barrier prospects put up when a salesperson comes calling.

The first thing people will notice when you start a conversation with them through DMs is that it feels like being approached by a friend rather than a salesperson. It allows you to bridge that gap between a complete stranger to a potential client.

What not to do in the DMs

A lot of you might get nervous about DMing strangers on any social platform because you’re afraid the prospect will shoot you down and be rude, while some of you may say “I don’t know what to say in DM.”

Or you don’t feel comfortable repeating the same “script” over and over again, which to be honest is lazy and ineffective with prospects who are naturally skeptical. If you use the same exact script on everyone, they’ll know you’re not really interested in helping them.

What to do in the DMs

1. Ask the right questions at the right time and then later, get specific.

We start from general-based questions and then move to specific goal-based questions using the FROG Strategy.

2. Be casual, drop the formalities.

Talk like you’ve known the person for years, open up to them and share your stories with them. This is how you can break the ice and get them comfortable to talk to you. I call this sales intimacy.

3. Tell them stories that showcase your personality.

If you love traveling, talk about it! Find a common ground and mention your story behind it. Most importantly, talk to them like you have known them for ages!

The FROG Strategy

For those who love structure, here is an easy way to guide the discussion.

Here’s a breakdown of what each letter stands for and what kind of questions you can ask at each stage. Start from F, then move progressively to R, O, and finally G.

F: Friends and Family

First things first, ask the prospect about their home, friends, and family:

“I just saw your post. Your dog was terribly sick last week. How is he now?”

“Just saw it was your daughter’s 5th birthday. She’s such a doll! Did she have a theme for her party?”

“Your trip to Hawaii looked like so much fun! I am planning a vacation too. Was it your first time? I’d love to get your insights!”

R: Region

Next, ask them about the region they’re living in or a region they are/were associated with:

“What’s the weather like in (city name)? It’s freezing here, I’m literally covered in my Snuggie all day."

“I just noticed that you’re from Vancouver! I lived there for 6 years and started my business there! What area of the city are you in?”

“My mom’s from Seattle. I miss that city so much! I’ve spent all my summers there. How long have you lived there?”

O: Occupation

Then, talk to them about their profession and their passion:

“So tell me, how long have you been a business coach?”

“I always wanted to be a teacher growing up, there’s something about inspiring the next generation. What’s your favorite part of your job?”

“How did you get called to do (insert career)?”

G: Goals

Finally, ask them what their goals or vision are for the next few months:

“What type of clients do you work with?”

"Any exciting product launches in the works?”

"Are you interested in growing your business this year?”

(insert a discovery question you would ask, where your product solves their problem).

How does the FROG Strategy Help?

The FROG strategy helps you build a relationship step by step. You take a step forward by asking them about their friends and family, and then get closer and more specific to their goals. Help them get comfortable slowly with each stage, and finally they will let their guard down.

Once you follow this process, the prospect will interact with you more casually and candidly; they won’t feel the dread of an interrogation from a stranger.

Here To Help First

When we place relationships first in the sales process, it builds trust, which is the ultimate goal of a healthy lifelong sales relationship which can lead to massive customer retention–and isn’t that the goal anyway?


Shannon deSouza @shannon
Shannon DeSouza is a sales superstar with 16 years of experience. She is empowering high ticket coaches with sales acceleration by building winning sales teams


Tell Us Below:

How do you build rapport with prospects?

I love this strategy! The acronym FROG is easy to remember and I like having this as a guide to get started. I had a call with a friend just yesterday, talking about DM outreach and she said ‘I don’t know what to say’. I just forwarded her this article! Thanks @shannon great insights.

1 Like

I have never had the guts to slide into the DMs—even contacting people I’d already built strong relationships with was scary (I did that for I think two programs I was launching, in a targeted way, to a warm audience). But fortune favors the bold, and this is a great strategy for building up to it so you know it’s not unwelcome!